Yeah it’s an old line but it applies. Check it out:

She was cute up until the point that she said she need 1000 pesos to get her weave redone. Damn, totally blew the fantasy on that one.

This one is classy. Sad that the pictures I do have don’t reflect it as well as I know it. Everytime I would stop by her spot to say “hola” she’d be like 30 minutes fixing herself up before coming to the door.

A long wait but always a worthwhile wait.

Well that’s the lie I told to get her to sleep with me. They do look a little alike, don’t they?

Cute, smart and driven.  So as I went down the path of making certain commitments and getting her going on a path of accomplishing some of her dreams something went horribly, horribly wrong.  

Since I made my resources available to help her realize her dreams I thought it wouldn’t be a problem for us to hang out from time to time.  No pressure, no commitments.  Let’s just have some fun and do some cool stuff.  So a trip to the mountains to do some rafting didn’t appeal to her because it was during a religious holiday.  Mind you she never went to church during the time I knew her so I was unclear on her rational but okay.  So how about a month later we will go to a beach resort for a week and hang out.  Well that didn’t work for her because she was in school that week (the school I’m paying for mind you).  So to that I said fine I’ll do both trips alone.  Okay, was her response.  So wouldn’t you know it, I met someone during that trip to the mountains who loves rafting, goes to church regularly but didn’t have a problem with that weekend and also was available to go away to the beach resort.  Tough luck!  I’m now hanging out with her and not the one in the picture who just couldn’t seem to find time for anything more than visiting Western Union to pick up the money I sent her

This was wifey for a hot minute.

I would come to town and she’d drop everything to make sure I was alright.

She’s good people. I just got bored and didn’t want to stick around with someone that had no real aspirations in life.

So how is it that when I met her she went off with a friend and I went off with someone else that same night but somehow she feels the need to send pictures of herself to me and not my friend who she hung out with.  If that sounds confusing then I’m happy to know it’s not just me.  Just enjoy the pics and know that she was HOT HOT HOT to dance with and that’s all I can be witness to

Did you sleep with her? No
Did she cook for you? No
Did she blow your mind with theories of the origins of the universe? No

So why the hell is she here?

Well because she was cute, drank my beer and told me she wasn’t into guys. Lesbianism is so sexy !

This one’s for an old road dog who’s spent some time here in the wilderness.  I’ll let him drop the story on this one <remember you can comment anonymously >

First, if you have small children, crickets or women prone to jealous fits when faced with a body that is superior to their own, please close this window and go to a PC where this can’t be seen.

Now that we have that out of the way, this is the “Baseline”. She is the one that all others are compared against. Well most others at least. She’s attractive, easy going, intelligent and very open (as is apparent by the pictures).

So you’re thinking maybe she had issues like the previous posts so far. Nope. Was she really a dude hiding her pride beneath those panties. Nope.

This time it was all about timing. I didn’t pull the trigger on that when I first met her though I did stay in contact over the years. Apparently not good enough because by the time I was ready to talk to her about some real stuff she had run off with another dude never to be found again.

If anyone has seen her please let me know as I’ll make a case to win her back provided that:

1) She looks as good now as she did when I took these pictures
2) She doesn’t have more than the one baby I know about
3) She hasn’t picked up any bad habits (like making unreasonable demands without anything of substance to offer in return)
4) The “Poon” hasn’t been too badly stretched from too many dudes up in it over the years

A gentleman can’t be too careful these days

Now she is really cool.  Probably one of the easiest going women I have had the pleasure to meet.  She’s a great cook, good enough in bed and really knows how to make a man feel great!  So what happened then?  Well…

She had a tendency to hit me up for some change everytime she came by to visit.  At first it was no big deal as it didn’t amount to much and I understood that she felt she had the right as we were fooling around.  But the change kept creeping up to the point where I finally asked her (or more accurately a friend of mine asked) what she expected from her man (at the time supposedly me).  To that she responded that her man should pay for everything including all her kids needs (remember Captain Save a Ho).  She elaborated that this is what a man is for.  

Now I don’t know about you but I see myself more than the caretaker of someone else’s kids and an open wallet to the whims of someone that only cooks, cleans and f*cks!  Given that those are fairly universal skills I think I’m justified.  So I very quietly moved on to the next.  

It’s a shame too, because if she had not opened her mouth she might have gotten her way with no protest (for a little while at least )